Oback Arama and Energy policy

Postedoriginally on Tuesday, June 24, 2008 12:54:36 PM

I'm Oback Arama and it’s time for a new day in American energy policy. I have hope that the changes I will institute will bring down the price of gas at the pump, bring down the level of the oceans and protect our homeland from hurricanes and tornados.
First, I‘m going to shut down market speculation by closing the Enron loophole. Then I am going to institute a windfall profits tax on the insane profits of Exxon Mobile and other American oil companies. By increasing their taxes they will be forced to lower the price of gasoline. Their approximate average of 10% return on investment is obscenely excessive. Next I will tax any other evil corporation with a return on investment in excess of 10%. I will be appointing Ralph Nader as my new Secretary of the Department of Reasonable Profits. My long term plan for bringing down oil prices is the nationalization of the oil companies in the US. I have vital experience in the oil industry due to the fact that in Illinois where I was a state senator we have some oil wells. The US government will bring the efficiencies of central government and planning to our energy problems. I will be appointing Maxine Waters as my new Secretary of the Department of Oil due to her intimate knowledge of the oil industry and socili... oops, I mean, aaaah, taking over things.

In my first 100 days as president, my face to face talks with President Ahmadinejad will insure the free flow of oil from Iran and our withdrawal from Iraq will bring an increased good will flow of oil from all oil producing nations of the world including that of our comrade, President Chavez. This is change that my extensive experience in foreign affairs and my winsome personality will bring to this nation, I’m pretty sure. I have the audacity of hope to think it will and that should be enough. Together we can do it. Remember that I need for you to send all of your change to me, pennies, nickels, quarters and even JFK half dollars which are cool cause his picture's on them. That’s change that I can use and believe in, and change that works. Can we all believe that? Yes we can! Yes we can! Yes we can! That’s why I’m running for president.

I’m Oback Arama and I approved this message.